5/26/2004
YET MORE HIGH CONCEPT
Sniglets that would make good names for rock bands:
- Fenderberg (fen’ - der - berg) n. The large glacial deposits that form on the insides of car fenders during snowstorms.
- Mcmonia (muk - moan’ - ee - uh) n. (chemical symbol: Mc) Noxious gas created by fast-food employee mopping under your table while you’re eating.
- Porkus non gratis (por’ - kus non grat’ - is) n. The scraggly piece of bacon left over at the bottom of the package.
- B+ Stampede (bee’ plus stam - peed’) n. The attempt by half the classroom to claim the paper with no name on it.
- Gapiana (ga - pee - an’ - uh) n. The unclaimed strip of land between the “you are now leaving” and “welcome to” signs when crossing state lines.
- Mummabolic Chorus (mum - uh- bah’ - lik ko’ - rus) n. When three or more people are singing along to a tune and suddenly discover they are all faking their way through the unintelligible lyrics.
- Pigslice (pig’ - slys) n. The last unclaimed piece of pizza that everyone is secretly dying for.
- Voitlock (voyt’ - lok) . n. When the basketball gets lodged between the rim and the backboard.
- Audiosis (odd - ee - oh’ - sis) v. Hearing a sound you don’t notice until it stops, e.g., the furnace or refrigerator shutting off.
- Corpus Neglecti (kor - pus nuh - glek’ - ty) n. The transformation of a former high-school athlete into a beer-bellied, middle-aged man.
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Boy, do I hate Mcmonia.
Not as a band name, necessarily.
I hate Mcmonia itself.
I think, “Get a real job,” when I see ticket scalpers outside the Metrodome.
But I think, “Maybe you’re working too hard,” whenever I have to deal with a Mcmonia-producing 16-year-old.
Comment by Paul — 5/26/2004 @ 4:27 pm