10/11/2004

PICK YOUR POISON

Every parent, of course, hopes to bring their child(ren) to adulthood without the kid(s) acquiring any major vices. Different parents have differing opinions on what constitutes a major vice, of course; some parents consider military school an appropriate punishment for eating your salad with your dessert fork, while others simply hope that Junior will make it to adulthood without too many felonies on the juvie record.

It’s been a while since I had an open discussion thread here, so I’m throwing out this question: If you had to pick one vice from the following list for your child to acquire before he or she turned 18, what would you pick? In other words, what on the following list would bug you the least?

  • Tobacco
  • Alcohol
  • Marijuana
  • Hallucinogens
  • Narcotics
  • Stimulants/Depressants
  • Premarital sex
  • Pornography
  • Petty crimes (vandalism, shoplifting)
  • Violent tendencies
  • Overt racism

Personally? I’d pick tobacco. It’s horrible for your health, but it doesn’t affect your ability to function in life, it doesn’t distort your view of the opposite sex, it can’t lead to pregnancy, and it wouldn’t reflect too badly on me. But what do you think?

If anybody responds to this, I’ll explain why I’m asking the question. But hey, if you don’t care, neither do I!

Posted by Mark @ 10:22 pm | | Permalink
This post is filed under: General & Pointless polls

13 Comments

  1. Having just quit smoking after 25 years, I will have to go with sex

    Comment by doug — 10/11/2004 @ 11:52 pm

  2. 1. Pornography
    2. Alcohol
    3. (Protected!) Premarital Sex
    distant 4th: Marijuana

    I don’t see porn as that much of a vice, as long as it’s not an obsession. Kids can get into alcohol, but again, as long as it’s not an addiction, it’s not a problem. Kids will also experiment with sex - it’s more important that if they do it, they do it in a way that won’t get someone pregnant.

    And finally, I don’t think pot is as bad as tobacco because it’s not physically addictive and it’s a mild intoxicant like alcohol. The only problem is it’s illegal, which opens up a whole ‘nother can of worms.

    Any of the others are physically damaging, addictive, show serious weakness of character and/or are very illegal.

    Comment by Dave — 10/12/2004 @ 1:04 am

  3. Assuming the sex is protected, it would be my choice.

    Comment by Jon — 10/12/2004 @ 8:12 am

  4. I gotta go with the porn or sex, in that order. Either can cause some serious trouble, but (with some minor precaustions) they won’t get you dead or in jail.

    Comment by Jammer — 10/12/2004 @ 9:41 am

  5. I’m sitting here looking at a picture of my five-month old and have gotta say porn looks like the most harmless of the options.
    You can’t get a disease or cancer from porn and it’s highly unlikely to land you in jail — unless you’re making it.

    Comment by Zygote — 10/12/2004 @ 10:40 am

  6. I’d agree with others — porn (as long it isn’t of the illegal/violent variety, and as long as it doesn’t become an addiction) isn’t as harmful as the other things you throw out there. Nor is there as much potential for permanent or long-lasting effects, jail, health risks, et cetera.

    Comment by Vidiot — 10/12/2004 @ 11:25 am

  7. When you say “acquire”, what mean you by that? If you mean “occasionally use/view/do”, I would say probably marijuana (disregarding the legal implications of doing something totally proscribed by law). Or maybe racism - you’ve got a shot at making them understand why it’s wrong. You have to consider the long-term ramifications of things, and addictions to alcohol or hard drugs are difficult to treat at best. And since you’re limiting this to under 18, premarital sex wouldn’t be on my list. Life’s complicated enough for teenagers without introducing sex (although I’m not naive, I know the stats). Porn and violent tendencies tend to point at deeper problems; petty crimes tend to get you mixed up with serious criminals at some point. Tobacco has such serious health effects. At least you didn’t include “Voting Republican”.

    Comment by Harry — 10/12/2004 @ 1:21 pm

  8. Sorry, gotta agree with Mark. there’s an awful lot of qualifying going on with these sex and porn picks.

    I could just as easily say “well, I’d take alcohol, as long as it didn’t give my kid a hangover, liver damage or addiction, and he/she had the good sense to get a designated driver.”

    Comment by bryan — 10/12/2004 @ 2:51 pm

  9. SEX SEX SEX! YEAH BABY YEAH! MORE SEX = LESS VIOLENCE.

    Young men who get laid rarely resort to crime or terrorism or militant Republicanism.

    Comment by M1EK — 10/12/2004 @ 8:18 pm

  10. Young men who get laid rarely resort to crime or terrorism or militant Republicanism

    True. Charles Manson never really killed anyone himself … man.

    Neither did David Koresh … Jim Jones … Jeffrey Dahmer … Ted Bundy … the weather underground … the bikers at Altamont, etc.

    Comment by bryan — 10/12/2004 @ 8:26 pm

  11. Of course there is no unassailable answer here. However, for me the decision is based in part on the degree to which a person is enslaved to a given vice. I’m with Mark on tobacco. Having personally experienced all but one of the above vices as a minor, I found that as an adult I was only able to completely neutralize the effects of illegal drug use and petty crime. But it required facing up to my situation, a tremendous leap of faith and almost completely changing whom I associated with to achieve that success. That being said, I still consider myself a smoker, even though I haven’t had a cigarette in over nine months. To paraphrase William Burroughs, once a junkie, always a junkie.

    Both alcohol and tobacco have proven methods for overcoming one’s addiction to them. But compared with alcohol, tobacco use is less catastrophically destructive to others.

    Sexual attitudes change constantly over time, and my teen-aged forays of 20 years ago seem quaint compared with what seems to occur today. I draw the distinction between pornography with eroticism at whether the depiction debases humanity. By that standard, eroticism is practically extinct. I also say pornography is causing far more damage to society than gay marriage would ever do.

    I found it is possible to sublimate violent tendencies and racism, yet under stressful conditions it can be very difficult to restrain oneself.

    Comment by beastofsound — 10/13/2004 @ 9:23 am

  12. So are you going to tell us why you’re asking?

    Comment by Vidiot — 10/13/2004 @ 10:27 pm

  13. i’ve gotta go with pot. even the legal ramifications are small compared to what you can get for screwing around with people “too old/young” for you (at least in ny state). sex can be a lot more emotionally damaging than marajuana, and i’d rather make my kid get a job to pay back a fine (standard mj punishment for minors w/ small amounts) than have to watch them go through emotional pain. as for porn? come on now. porn doesnt keep kids from having sex (although it does provide some new ideas), and at least there’s a cap on how much pot your kid can get at any given time. hard drugs? too dangerous. i’d like a living kid with more than 50% functional grey matter, if it’s all the same to yall. petty crimes are kind of embarassingly lame, and violence is too sketchy. i don’t even want to get started on bigotry. at least pot won’t hurt anybody else if you’re not a dumbass about it. so, good ol’ mary jane it is then.

    Comment by lvrz — 10/16/2004 @ 7:50 pm

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